The Conversation
by sheraiah
Summary: Eavesdropping on a parent can be hazardous to your peace of mind, especially if you're an elf. COMPLETE


Disclaimer: Don't own it, don't claim to.  
  
A/N: For those who have not read my other fic, Of a Father and Son this may not make as much sense as it will for those who have read that story. This takes place after the afore mentioned fic, during a certain contest.  
  
"In a tree," Thranduil said with a smirk. Elrond snorted.  
  
"Mordor! From a wood elf that is hardly unusual. You will have to do better than that." Elrond leveled an unsteady finger at his companion before lifting his wineglass to his lips for another draught. Thranduil chuckled shaking his head.  
  
"Nay, Peredhel, it is your turn. You will not wriggle your way out of this by trying to distract me. Where?" Thranduil lifted his own wineglass, his eyes fixed on Elrond over the rim as he drank. Elrond appeared to consider for a moment before replying.  
  
"A fountain in Lorien." It was Elrond's turn to smirk as he noted Thranduil's expression. "Your turn, Oropherion." Thranduil steepled his fingers and cast his eyes toward the ceiling as he sifted through his memory.  
  
"The balcony outside your 'Hall of Fire' during one of our visits here before Legolas was born." Thranduil grinned triumphantly. "Best that, if you can." Elrond returned the grin cheekily.  
  
"On the banquet table in your halls during one of our visits to your realm before Arwen was born. Best that one, if you can," he returned taking another drink of wine with a slightly shaky flourish. Both elves had consumed a great deal of wine and were indeed in a contest with each other to see who had the greater tolerance for the substance. So dulled were their senses that they failed to notice the four sets of eavesdropping ears on the balcony.   
  
At that moment, both Elladan and Elrohir wore identical expressions of disgust while Estel and Legolas stifled fits of laughter. Whatever they had expected to overhear, it certainly was not this. It had been Legolas' idea to spy on the drinking contest. He looked not the least bit embarrassed by the information he was hearing about his parents. Estel was similarly unfazed by the rather shocking topic of conversation. The twins however, were scandalized to say the least. They made no indication of terminating the operation despite their discomfort and swiftly hushed their younger co-conspirators as Thranduil made his reply to Elrond's challenge.  
  
"Please! I cannot count the number of times Valilis and I used that very same table. Why do you think I have never replaced it? Hmmm, let me see……ah yes, on the desk in your study here in Imladris. In fact, that was where we conceived Legolas." Thranduil's slightly glazed eyes gleamed with amusement. Three sets of eyes turned to the afore mentioned elf who blushed fiercely and made a gesture to his grinning companions wholly inappropriate for a prince. Elrond snorted once again.  
  
"That desk has seen more activity than most of the beds in this house. Not only was your son conceived on it, but mine as well. And I know for a fact that both of the twins have used it for assignations on more than one occasion, even though they do not know that I know." Elrond favored Thranduil with a haughty look for a moment before both elves dissolved into laughter. The laughter was echoed outside the window by Legolas and Estel and it was the twins' turn to blush and make rude gestures.  
  
"Well at least Legolas is discreet. I have yet to actually catch him at it, but I can always tell when he has been with a lady. He gets the same expression on his face that Valilis always did after the fact. It is my turn again, is it not?" At Elrond's nod he continued, "On the roof of the stables in Mirkwood." Elrond's eyebrows shot up into his hairline.  
  
"Was this before or after your marriage?"   
  
"Before. We were hiding from her Adar." Thranduil returned with a sly smirk. "King or not, he would have had my head on a pole if he had caught us. Your turn again."  
  
"In Celebrian's parents' bed, before our marriage. Unfortunately, we were caught. Suffice it to say that if the wedding plans had not already been made, they certainly would have after that. Trust me when I say that even battling a legion of orcs single handed is preferable to facing Celeborn under circumstances such as that." Thranduil laughed briefly then bit his lower lip in a manner uncannily like his son.  
  
"I am quite happy to say that Valilis' parents never caught us. I very much doubt her Adar would have left me able to sire children. Is there any more wine in that bottle?" He looked mournfully into his empty cup, then across the table to the bottle next to Elrond, who snickered at him.  
  
"Here, you old sot, there is enough for two more glasses." Thranduil shot him a sardonic look.  
  
"Sot, yourself. You had best let me pour; I do not believe you could hit the glass." Ignoring Elrond's affronted expression, the king of Mirkwood filled both glasses. Lifting his glass, he solemnly offered a toast, "To our wives, may mine rest peacefully in Mandos' Halls and may yours fret until you join her in Valinor." Thranduil raised his glass and drained it as Elrond did the same. Thranduil gazed moodily into the fire that burned in the hearth for several minutes before turning back to his host. Elrond's head rested on the table, his empty glass still in his hand. Thranduil chuckled. "I win, you Noldor lordling." He looked down onto his glass, frowning. Setting the cup aside, he leaned his head back into the cushions of the chair and drifted into dreams.  
  
"Well, I suppose we shall have to see them to their beds." Elladan stated, a rueful expression gracing his face. "Estel, help Legolas with his Adar. Elrohir and I will take care of ours." With one last snicker, Estel followed Legolas over the window sill and assisted him in carrying Thranduil to his rooms. The twins did the same for Elrond, and then met the younger two in the hallway. Elladan fixed both of them with a stern glare. "I am certain I need not mention that the conversation we overheard is never to be repeated in part or in whole to anyone while we all live. Am I making myself completely understood?" Legolas pulled an appalled face.  
  
"What in Illuvatar's name makes you think I would ever repeat that to anyone? Ugh! Estel, if you so much as breathe one word to anyone, I shall hunt you to the ends of Arda and fashion your skin into a new quiver." He glared at the human through narrowed eyes, reminding the other three of Thranduil in one of his fouler moods. Estel threw up his hands as if to ward off his friend.  
  
"None shall hear of it from me, you have my solemn oath." He grinned suddenly at Legolas, "Desk boy." He fled down the hall, Legolas on his heels. The twins shared a look before heading to their rooms.  
  
"We shall need to find a new place to entertain ladies." 


End file.
